Friday, April 17, 2015

ThE LiFE Of bActeriA~~


I was asked by one of my very close friends to write something on bacteria... So here I go! Now.. where do I start from! Well I can’t imagine my life without bacteria! Today I am what I am...and in future too I will be what I will be because of them :P ..
Everyone of us as a child has been asked about their preference if given a chance to born again. Answers like bird, tiger, whale, ant etc are the common ones. But did anyone hear bacteria as an answer? Atleast I didn’t. They are the most neglected species on this earth since time immemorial.
Do you prefer test matches over T20?? If your answer is no then why don’t you give bacteria a chance. When you can have a luxurious and contended life in 20mins..then why even think about counting years! Maintaining quality instead of worrying about the quantity would certainly lead you to happiness!
Here are some of the points that might help you taking your decision!
These little creatures are the most pampered ones I have ever seen! How many of us live on a pH maintained diet?? I personally don’t have any specific diet. I eat almost anything that comes my way till I am hungry! But I always make sure I prepare pH maintained food for these little ones, strictly made with RO water and sterilised for a certain fixed amount of time! How many of us get to eat such stringently cooked food everytime!??
Being a bacteria has its own advantage. You can easily have your own production unit of anything you wish for. So this saves a huge amount of your money which you would end up spending on a protein rich shampoo, hair colour, cream, medicines etc. If you need something ..just clone the gene of interest in your DNA and you are good to go! Glow in the dark ( you again have the opportunity to choose your favourite colour here :P ...red, green ,yellow...anything you want),
secrete any protein you want ( use it....throw it if you have excess ), produce any antibiotic you want to keep off your enemies or use it just for your own survival...etc etc...the list goes on.. Do you see the advantage?? You would be spoilt for choice...I can guarantee you that... And what’s more!! You can even pass your acquired traits to your progeny at no extra cost :D ....your legacy continues...generation after generation ;) ..
And the most fascinating thing that I find about bacteria is time travel :D ....Well not that exact kind of time travel that comes to your mind... If you are bored of your life and wish to take a break...flash freeze comes to your rescue :P.
Freeze yourself and stay at -80°C for months! Let people know when you want to continue again. So there you are...Starting a new life, 2k-3k generation time ahead....while your fellow bacteria, in some other vial who had shared the same box with you at some point of time, would have perished long back and lost in the sands of time :P ...

I can go on and on...but one must stop before others start getting bored :D ...So I hope I could change your views on bacteria a bit...there’s no denying that they have a better life than we have. Having a fulfilling life of twenty minutes is certainly better than 100years of slogging. I hope you have made up your mind and wished to God about what you want to be in your next birth ! Just make sure you end up in some lab and not in garbage ..else you might really have a tough times surrounded by all kind of bullies :D ...
Btw did you know that there are slow growing bacteria as well.. who take weeks to double. And life isn’t that easy in a 100mm dia petri plate :P ...Nevermind, theres always a second chance ;)

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